yuerstruly

fic: sober reverie

links: ao3 | dreamwidth

sober reverie is a piece born from my cursed thoughts, which is really just

imagine Seunghan in a *some at a frat party

followed by

the setup for eunseok/sungchan/seunghan would be so easy for me but im laughing at the idea of sungchan fucking his little

and

idk imagine being assigned a little that you want to fuck. i would go crazy

The reason for *some? I couldn’t decide. It’d been about a week since Idol Human Theater came out when those thoughts first came to me, so there was a voice in the back of my head that really wanted to go with “Seunghan and the hyungs that dote on him.” On the other hand, I’d never posted smut, and I barely wrote steamy makeout scenes. I ended up cutting it down to a threesome since I realized I was partial to sungseung and eunhan.

The original idea was simply porn without plot, with the frat being a backdrop of sorts. It turned into something a bit more emotional, capitalizing on vulnerability and a bit of homesickness, as well as the invisible taboo of “families” in universities. Found family, except you’re sometimes forced to interact with someone.

I did not expect to get this done anytime soon. I’d had just 400 words sitting in my Scrivener until February 9^th, and then I went to two frat parties in a row that weekend. None like the experience portrayed in the fic, except squeezing through people while holding a cup with alcohol. Not fun!

I spit out 4k of that in one night, largely motivated by Ten’s debut mini album TEN and Kim Feel’s yours, sincerely, then slept at 6AM. No regrets, though. I don’t think I would have come back to it anytime soon had I not finished then, so though I may feel regret on some level regarding the writing, I also am choosing to not dwell on it. On the other hand, I had no idea what to do with the chapter titles, then after staring at the playlist I was about to share in relation to the fic, I went with ‘Like a G6’ lyrics. A song so classic you still hear it at frat parties in the year 2024.

Last but not least, I want to give the biggest shoutout to Klara for encouraging me to write this and holding my hand while I yelled my incoherent thoughts into our DMs. I also thank everyone for reading the fic, and promise I will be back with another sungseokhan!

fic: my funny cat valentine

links: ao3 | dreamwidth

I would like to preface this by saying that since the fic is only 4.5k words, I probably don’t have as much to say as I would about a 30k fic (which you will probably get from me someday, though the exact timeline remains unknown).

The idea first came about on September 18, 2023, inspired by this animation short on Douyin, which I actually didn’t even remember existing until I was digging through my Discord DMs a couple of days ago to look for when I had first thrown this idea into the void. My Douyin addiction used to be terrible, but I must thank it for throwing generally entertaining clips onto my feed. I sat with the idea for a week, but it was only that until I DM’d nik with the following:

it’s just doyoung who finds jaehyun kinda cocky and annoying at work but he needs a ride home once and he’s like “why the fuck does this guy take a motorcycle to work!!” but then doyoung gets dropped off where he lives and he’s like. rambling about stuff and when he turns around to thank jaehyun he sees the man feeding stray cats food in a tube that he apparently brings along with him everywhere he goes and doyoung is now like. hm i’m kinda attracted wtf

That is the first scene and the foundation of everything that comes after. It quickly turned into a 5+1, with everything revolving around Doyoung, his unwillingness to take public transportation, and the contrast between how Doyoung imagined Jaehyun to be and the things he sees in their interactions.

I’d written about half of the first part last fall, then didn’t touch it until late January this year, the main reason being that the portion I did write looked like a fill-in-the-blank worksheet whenever I opened the document. I did not want to look at it. I ended up rewriting that first 1,000 words from scratch, and though I’ve left out some details I originally thought I wanted to keep in, but looking back, I like it better this way.

My major struggle writing this was actually word count. I’m not one to usually dwell on word count, but when I compared the 2,000 in the first scene to the 500 in the second scene, I started to panic. I ran to Alek (my lifesaver) to scream about this, and was reassured that it was fine. Turns out, the remaining scenes were all around that length, so it was much more consistent than I had planned it to be.

The actual writing process? I spit out 3.5k words on Monday, February 12^th, staying up until 2AM to finish it. Then I woke up and shared it with Alek at 8AM, who got back to me within 3 hours. Truly a godsend. I edited it while waiting for my Statistics professor, and posted during class (I sit in the first two rows of the lecture room, by the way). A crazy 24 hours to live through, but I regret none of it. I rode the waves of vibes!!!